Warning: Do not read before or while eating!

This past Sunday, Christy, Leah and I went on a food tour of three towns surrounding Cartagena.  It was an all-day ordeal, and we were literally always eating.  Yes, yes, I know: I wasn't supposed to talk about food for a while, but I do believe this is an exception.  

Our first stop was the Bazurto Market.  Sundays are not their busiest days, so we were free to amble along and take some pictures.  They sold everything to do with animals and plenty of fruits and vegetables.  We sloshed through fish scales, animal blood and juices, and tons of other gunk I'd rather not think about.  On a typical day, I really wouldn't mind the bacteria-ridden walk, but seeing how I still had an open wound on my toe from dancing the night before, I had to be extra cautious on where I stepped.  It's amazing gangrene hasn't crept in yet.  

These are cow eyeballs.  Don't they just make you want to eat them raw?  I guess they sometimes sell cattle testicles, too.  What a shame we missed those.  One of the items we did try was cow udder, a tan, hide-looking sheet that was hung up along different stalls.  When it was cooked later for us, it was downright chewy and incredibly salty.  The ladies said it was because they had such little time to prepare it.  Uh huh.  Because normally, cow udder has such a wonderful taste.  

I found the opened chicken with all her innards intact particularly magnificent.  Do you see the red-orange sacks on the left side?  Those are the poor girl's eggs!  There are at least three of them, and some of the chickens we passed had more, and the eggs were even bigger.  Our tour guide, Lili, was going to buy some for us to try, but after hearing we had to purchase the whole chicken, she changed her mind.  One of these days...

Colombia's got a long way to go in terms of recycling (a very long way), so this warmed my heart a bit.  All these used plastic bottles are filled with the Colombian version of sour cream.  I do wonder if they disinfected the bottles first or just rinsed them out.  In the front are big blocks of cheese.  Luckily, the cheese here is not my favorite, and I have no problem staying away from it.  

We all tried these sausage balls with lime juice squeezed on top.  Many people eat them with hard-boiled eggs as well.  They were quite tasty, but Lili said that most of the time they are made of all the leftover parts of donkeys or pigs, though the man insisted they were beef.   

There were enough guts for everyone, including the cats and birds.  

After a forty-five minute drive, we ended up at the edge of a small town to try some chicharrones, or fried pork rinds.  They were served with yucca and cheese and were just okay.  We also sipped some chicha (corn beer).  Being special guests, the owner gave us a tour of the outdoor kitchen, which was quite clean and organized.  There's a whole process to preparing the chicharrones and yucca; it looked like hot work.  

The drive through the countryside was spectacular.  Rolling green hills, tall trees, cooler temperatures.  I cannot wait to venture out again and maybe try some hiking.  

Since we obviously hadn't eaten enough already, we stopped by this restaurant where they prepared a full-course meal for us, including the cow udder.  Lili had bought some fruits from the market that the ladies turned into juices, which we drank while waiting for the meal.  

I feel rather badly for looking all gleeful next to the poor dead animals, but somebody has to be happy that she is still alive.  The first animal is a jungle rat and the second an armadillo.  Men hunt these creatures using a sling shot.  As much as I hate to admit it, both were incredibly tasty (of course, cooking them in coconut milk probably helped) and the rat particularly tender.  

This is the dirt-floor kitchen where they prepared the juices and smoked the meat.  Since we were out in the middle of nowhere, there was no running water (this included the bathroom).  These people must be immune to just about everything.  

Our final stop was the town of Palenque, the first free, black settlement to arise in Colombia.  It all started in the late 16th century when Benkos Bioho, a former prince in Africa, decided he was sick and tired of slave work and led a group to freedom.  Although the Spanish government tried to recapture the 200 runaway slaves, the time, money and effort became too much, and the Spanish king eventually told his minions to give up.  

The statue was in the center of town along with a church and playground, by far the nicest area around.  The Colombian government continues to shell out money to help preserve this historical village.  Right now, they are working on the sewage system, and the roads were muddied with drained "water".  (Remember my toe?) 

We visited this lady's house where she showed us how to make these delectable sweets.  All you have to do is pour some milk, sugar, and shredded coconut into a large cauldron, stir until it's the right consistency, and wala, you have dessert! 

The conclusion of our time in Palenque was visiting the ninety-year-old witch doctor and trying some of his cure-for-all-ailments remedy...alcohol with seven different plants mixed in.  Man, was it strong!  This man chooses to live very humbly and sleeps on an old mattress in a room much like this one.  He told us Palenque used to be safe, and people would leave their doors open all night.  In the last thirty years, though, crime has sky-rocketed.  It sounds like what is happening in many other parts of the world.  

Eight hours later, we drove home, drowsy from all the food and sugar, but now having experienced the other side of Cartagena.